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Daisy does not qualify for an AKC Canine Good Citizen, however she has passed her WWBD* with flying colors. The testing is quite rigid, and the dog must be consistent in each of 15 categories:

1. Only listens when it suits him/her.

2. Decorates house with socks and panties purloined from dirty laundry basket.
<span style="color: #FFFFFF">....</span>2a. Can amazingly do this in the 3 nanoseconds that it takes you to open the door to your spouse's new boss and his wife.

3. Escapes whenever possible.
<span style="color: #FFFFFF">....</span>3a. During escape, gets as dirty as possible.

4. Can distinguish between Gucci and Target shoes when selecting which pair to chew.

5. Bays nonstop for a minimum of 17 minutes at a leaf that has fallen from a tree.

6. Steals food at every opportunity.
<span style="color: #FFFFFF">....</span>6a. Quietly pukes up stolen food in middle of night next to bed.
<span style="color: #FFFFFF">....</span>6b. Appears pleased when owner steps in puked up stolen food at 5:30 a.m.

7. Really does eat homework.

8. Totally ignores baseboards until they have been painstakingly sanded and painted.

9. Hogs bed.
<span style="color: #FFFFFF">....</span>9a. Gets highly irritated when owner attempts to use more than 6 of space on bed.

10. Just when you think she/he is finally housebroken, pees on your pillow.

11. Eats own poop.
<span style="color: #FFFFFF">....</span> 11a. Prefers cat poop.
<span style="color: #FFFFFF">....</span> 11b. See 6a and 6b.

12. Enjoys the taste of Bitter Apple.

13. Decides that NO!!!! means Good Dog!!! Keep doing that!!!.

14. Humps future Mother In Law's leg at first meeting.
<span style="color: #FFFFFF">....</span> 14a. Follows up with intense crotch inspection.
<span style="color: #FFFFFF">....</span> 14b. Seals the deal by pooping in her suitcase.

15. Able to successfully execute 1 – 14 because they have perfected the Aren't I SOOOOOO Cute? face.
<span style="color: #FFFFFF">.....</span>
<span style="color: #FFFFFF">.....</span>
*WWBD = What Would Beagle Do?
 
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